4 July—Every Independence Eve, a British college chum, who despite being a world traveller chose to live in the sceptered isle, gets on his iPad to try to rub it in to his colonial friends who, after university, have had the good sense to forsake England’s green and pleasant land and return to the mountains and the prairies of God-blessed America.

Here’s this year’s rub:

Don’t you gentlemen ever regret that your country chose to go it alone? They’re making a big thing about baseball having originated here. If we can’t get you back, we might as well chuck our lot in with India. They rule us anyway. Mind you in rip-off Britain, everybody is trying to recoup following COVID, Brexit, Ukraine and Boris. I’m not joking. Nobody uses cash anymore, since the banks wouldn’t have time to print it what with our galloping inflation. That apart, summer has been glorious. Cricket, Henley, Wimbledon, it’s all happening. Nostalgia? Do enjoy your special day; but remember, you’re always welcome in the Mother country.

J

J, it must be pointed out, is a 4B—born, bred, brainwashed Brit. And he has a great sense of humo(u)r, a sine qua non for any resident of the United Kingdom to maintain his sanity. Especially these days.

As for J’s invidious points, only one demands serious comment. I must admit, I had heard decades ago that his people were the originators of baseball. As if I care, of course, because baseball died when the Dodgers forsook Brooklyn. But, when you think about it, the Brits gave us (and Japan and China and Cuba and everywhere else) baseball while keeping cricket for themselves and a few other underprivileged countries (i.e., the British Empire).

I must admit, too, I thoroughly enjoyed the several highly civilized, genteel cricket matches I was able to sleep through without missing any of the action, such as it may have been. To its credit, cricket reflects the laid-back British attitude to virtually everything. Just like politics: over here, candidates run for office; over there, candidates stand for office. How many British politicians can you imagine running for anything?

And let’s not forget that the fathers of our country, when they weren’t playing chess and plotting against the mother country, quite probably played cricket. Because rugby, soccer, and basketball hadn’t been invented back then.

Could Thomas Jefferson have bowled a maiden over? Who wasn’t his slave, of course . . .