2 October—Corollary to Momentous serendipity, it’s distressing that nascent Regional School District 20, having amicably (albeit infelicitously) dealt with the momentous issues of colors and a mascot, should now be “sparring” (according to the headline of the 29 September story in the Republican-American) over the considerably less consequential issue of a name for the region’s high school, currently called Wamogo High School.

It’s especially distressing because none of the three best names for the high school was even mentioned at the region’s long-term planning committee meeting.

So consider, first, the name Goshen-Litchfield-Morris-Warren-in-Alphabetical-Order High School. The Morris contingent, which objected to having any one town in the high school name (specifically referring to Litchfield, of course, as in Litchfield Hills, probably because Morris resents having been sloughed off by Litchfield in 1859), certainly can’t object to having all four towns incorporated in the high school name—even if alphabetical order puts their town in third place.

If that’s too long, however, Region 20 could follow the practice of soon-to-be-former Regional School District 6, its current three-town constituent, and simply name the high school—and the region, come to think of it—with the acronym comprising the first two letters of each of the towns, in order of population from low to high, forming the pseudo-Native American Wamogo. Thus, with Litchfield’s population being greater than those of the other three towns (in so many ways), we’re talking about another pseudo-tribe—or perhaps a pseudo-sept—the Wamogoli.

But since it’s always good to have a school—especially a high school—named after a person living or dead, real or fictional, preferably popular and easy to remember (but not a politician, scientist, educator, philanthropist, athlete, actor, or other undeserving celebrity), that selfsame acronym should be anagrammatized to a name everybody will recognize or think they recognize. Thus, Wil Magoo—and only Wil Magoo—is the logical and ideal exemplar and namesake for Region 20’s high school.

Think about it. While most American adolescents would prefer the name Always (as in Always High), the more mature teenagers of Region 20 certainly would be proud to attend Wil Magoo High. And what parent in Goshen, Litchfield, Morris, and Warren (in alphabetical order) wouldn’t be delighted to belong to the Wil Magoo High School PTO?