28 November—An editorial cartoon by Bill Day pictures a turkey asking, “Seriously, how would you like spending your entire life being compared to fools and moronic politicians? Huh? Huh? Aside from that, Happy Thanksgiving!” Good point. Turkeys certainly deserve more respect. That includes not being bred for slaughter and not being forced to endure inhumane treatment during their short lives and executions. And, by the way, Charles Darwin praised turkeys’ intelligence. He never praised politicians’ intelligence.

So Peach and Blossom, the pair of handsome white turkeys named after Delaware’s state flower and ceremonially pardoned a couple of days ago by Joe Biden when he took a break from (thankfully) nominating all the federal judges he can while he has a Democratic Senate majority to confirm them, must be the luckiest birds of their feather in the U.S.A. If you believe that, you’re sure to enjoy your heartless, unhealthy Thanksgiving engorgement. Because the truth is, the whole lavish, cleverly staged White House media event is nothing but a sham to divert attention from the cruel, inhumane abuse that turkeys and all other animals raised on factory farms—and not only those that are slaughtered to be eaten—are subjected to.

The presidential Thanksgiving turkey pardon actually had truly humane roots as a Christmas turkey pardon when Abraham Lincoln’s youngest son, Tad, grew fond of an intended Christmas dinner and named him Jack. Tad’s understanding father spared Jack and he thus became the first turkey to live in the White House. Probably few if any avian turkeys have lived there ever since.

Don’t even think about all the foul turkeys Donald Trump has pardoned and will pardon without ceremony. But these days only one White House fowl turkey is intended to be ceremonially pardoned; the other “lucky” bird is there as a stand-in in the event the star drops dead or is otherwise unable to perform for the media. Like virtually all living creatures raised for meat, the turkeys are bred to “grow-to-death” so large—Peach and Blossom weigh about 40 pounds—and so fast that their organs can barely keep up, if they keep up at all. In fact, turkeys on factory farms are so unnaturally huge that many can’t even stand up without experiencing pain. As if anybody gives a damn.

Moreover, contrary to the reprehensibly misleading whitewash slathered on the gullible, uncaring public by the White House and the National Turkey Federation, after the cameras and recorders disappear the pardoned turkeys suffer essentially the same fates as their less photogenic brethren. The turkeys may not find themselves stuffed on the dinner table, but rather than living out their short, stressful, unfulfilled, painful lives at luxurious sanctuaries, they’re actually sent to Auschwitz-Birkenau facilities, often being imprisoned in inappropriate solitary confinement and subjected to so-called “research” sponsored by the food industry.

So there’s no better time than Thanksgiving to suggest several more great reasons for you to not eat turkey. Ever.

Over 270 million turkeys are slaughtered each year, 46 million of them for Thanksgiving meals. Modern domestic turkeys, which are twice the size of their ancestors of less than a century ago, are selectively bred to maximize meat production and are forced to grow so big that they can’t do normal things like walk and breathe properly. And the hens are artificially inseminated. Forcibly, of course. Is that a life for any sentient being?

Like humans, turkeys form strong bonds with other turkeys, animals, and people. And like our pets, turkeys enjoy playing and are curious. And lovable. But the ones bred for you to eat never get to experience things like spreading their wings, running around, or being treated kindly. Let alone humanely.

Turkeys are naturally affectionate and smart. Like any animals. Wild turkeys, like the ones I photographed in my meadow, love to forage, build nests, and roam around their natural territories. Domestic turkeys bred for meat, on the other hand, are forced to live in cramped conditions inside dark sheds with nowhere to roam, forage, or build nests.

Aggressive behavior is common in those high-stress conditions. But instead of raising turkeys in less crowded conditions, greedy factory farmers reduce the risk of turkey-inflicted injury by searing off their beaks, cutting off their toes, and slicing off their snoods without anesthetics. Mutilating birds so they can’t mutilate each other? I’d like to mutilate and torture the factory farmers. Those bastards deserve it.

Besides being inhumane, factory farms are filthy and unhealthy. Infections are common among the turkeys, like the severe skin infection pictured here, which probably started when the victim was pecked by another stressed turkey in the cramped quarters.

Electrical stunning is supposed to render the victim turkeys unconscious before they meet their maker. But the stunning actually causes epileptic-like fits. Among the so-called humane methods of slaughter are neck cutting, dislocation, gas killing, and concussion stunning.

The most common form of stunning in this country is electric immobilization. The live turkeys are shackled by their ankles, which usually breaks their bones. Then they’re run along a conveyor belt through electrically charged water, which is supposed to render the poor captive birds unconscious. But often the electrical charge is too low and the victims are fully conscious as they get their throats slit by a rotating blade.

And if the blade misses, the living turkeys are dumped into scalding water anyway to loosen their feathers. Talk about being boiled alive.

The Humane Slaughter Act of 1978 requires what’s supposed to be humane handling of animals before and during slaughter. But it doesn’t apply to turkeys or chickens. Poultry birds and factory-farmed animals have virtually no legal protections.

The people who slaughter the animals suffer all manner of injuries, including burns, fractures, and amputations. Some even die from their injuries. Great. No problem there. Unlike their victims, those buggers certainly deserve to suffer, suffer, and suffer even more. They tend to be inhumane brutal sadists who delight in inflicting pain on their innocent, helpless victims any way they can. And people who consume animal-based products merely encourage that inhumane, unnecessary brutality.

Keep in mind that humane slaughter simply does not exist. For any animal. Keep in mind, too, that there are very tasty plant-based and other non-slaughter meat alternatives that are also healthier than cruelly manufactured animal-based meats.

And don’t forget that turkey meat wasn’t even served at the first alleged Thanksgiving dinner . . .