24 March—A fortnight ago we called Donald Trump a scourge. He’s also a pestilence, a marvelous noun that’s not used enough these days.

Pestilence, like pest, comes from the Latin for plague and originally referred to a fatal epidemic or pandemic disease like the bubonic plague, Spanish flu, or COVID-19. Now, of course, a pestilence is usually used figuratively to mean anything or anyone which or who is harmful, evil, wicked, and injurious in some way. Trump to a tee.

Just suppose, now, that some self-anointed benefactor of mankind and proponent of truth, justice, and the American way considered Donald Trump a pestilence and therefore felt obligated to put the country out of its misery by doing away with the tyrant.

Bad idea. Of course killing nonhuman and human animals is usually wrong and morally reprehensible. Moreover, it’s illegal and probably unworkable to shoot the President of the United States nowadays, given the heightened security surrounding Trump after the kid in Pennsylvania just managed to graze his ear. More important, it would be a wasted effort—because it wouldn’t change things to any meaningful extent.

We have the 25^th Amendment to the Constitution and the Presidential Succession Act as amended in 1947 to thank for that. The 25^th Amendment, ratified in 1967, tells how a president may be removed and what to do in the event. Given Trump’s ego, he won’t resign for any reason. Given Trump’s loyal and pusillanimous cadre of flunkies, he won’t be forced to resign for any reason. And who really knows about his health?

But in the event that Trump doesn’t get to serve out his term, the Presidential Succession Act kicks in. And that’s what makes Donald Trump’s involuntary (or even voluntary) departure from the presidency an event we shouldn’t hope for. It really hurts to write that, but everything is relative. And this is the line of presidential succession under Donald Trump:

1 Vice President JD Vance
2 Speaker of the House of Representatives Mike Johnson
3 President pro tempore of the Senate Chuck Grassley
followed by Cabinet secretaries in order of department creation:
4 Secretary of State Marco Rubio
5 Secretary of the Treasury Scott Bessent
6 Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth
7 Attorney General Pam Bondi
8 Secretary of the Interior Doug Burgum
9 Secretary of Agriculture Brooke Rollins
10 Secretary of Commerce Howard Lutnick
11 Secretary of Labor Lori Chavez-DeRemer
12 Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
13 Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Scott Turner
14 Secretary of Transportation Sean Duffy
15 Secretary of Energy Chris Wright
16 Secretary of Education Linda McMahon
17 Secretary of Veterans Affairs Doug Collins
18 Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem

See? If Trump goes, we get stuck with SCUM. Give Trump credit. He knew precisely what he was doing when he assembled his Second Cabinet of Unqualified Misfits primarily to make himself look good . . .