17 July—Word is going around that the popular Epstein-Barr virus, initialized as EBV, was named in honor of pimp Jeffrey Epstein and attorney general William Barr. Don’t believe it. Because the EBV was actually named after the people who discovered it in 1961, English pathologist Sir Anthony Epstein (who died last year at 102) and Irish virologist Yvonne Barr (who died in 2016 at 83), who was working in Epstein’s lab at Middlesex Hospital in London.

To refresh your memory, the Epstein-Barr Virus, also known as human herpes virus 4 (HHV-4), is one of the nine known human herpesvirus types and one of the most common viruses in humans. About 95 percent of the world’s population has been infected with it at some point in their lives. Most people are infected during childhood or adolescence, usually without experiencing noticeable symptoms.

Nevertheless, Epstein-Barr virus is highly contagious, spread primarily through close contact with bodily fluids, most commonly saliva, but also blood, urine, and semen, among others.

Once a person is infected with EBV, the virus remains latent in that lucky person for life. And even in death, because it’s not impossible for a cadaver’s bodily fluid to transmit the virus.

EBV is perhaps best known for causing infectious mononucleosis (glandular fever to Brits), although what’s popularly known as kissing disease because of spit swapping can also be caused by other viruses. It’s most common among adolescents and young adults. When real grown-ups get it, it’s not unlikely to be misdiagnosed and to develop complications.

Epstein-Barr virus also is closely linked to any number of cancers and autoimmune diseases. And it can infect non-human animals, like dogs, cats, and rabbits. Unfortunately, no vaccine has yet been formulated to prevent EBV infection. But when such a vaccine is developed, the world had better hope that the nutty mountebank Robert Kennedy Jr. isn’t around . . .