5 October—Absentee ballots are available now for state elections. They’re less than a month away and are guaranteed not to bring any meaningful change to Connecticut, thanks entirely to the Republican candidates for all the six statewide executive—so-called constitutional—offices and legislative—house and senate—offices that are up for grabs.

And that’s a crying shame, because the securely entrenched Connecticut Democrat executive-legislative trifecta has been able to get its irresponsibly wasteful, blatantly vote-buying way far too long.

So what are Connecticut Republicans doing to win back at least a modicum of control and respect? Start with the GOP candidates for the six statewide offices. Everybody knows the candidate for governor, charismatic, dynamic, innovative young State Senator Ryan Fazio from Greenwich. Well, over half the voters haven’t the foggiest idea who Ryan Fazio is. Nor do they care.

And just kidding about the adjectives describing Fazio. But he is relatively young at 36, having made it into the State Senate in a special election at 31. For comparison, John Rowland wasn’t elected governor until he was 37, on his second try—after having been elected to the Connecticut General Assembly at 23 and U.S. Congress at 27. Say what you will about Rowland, in addition to being somewhat of a political phenomenon, he was charismatic, dynamic, and innovative. Pity he also turned out to be corrupt. And stupid. (But he’s since been fully pardoned for his sins by the four-letter word with a five-letter name.

Back to Ryan Fazio, then, the twerpish state senator and his inept campaign advisers have run an entirely predictable, typically Republican by-the-book lackluster campaign, attacking incumbent Democrat Governor Ned Lamont who has notoriously and unashamedly bought his electoral success by pandering to state employee unions and similar special interests. And of course, Fazio can’t help making typical candidate promises everybody knows he won’t be able to keep—even on the inconceivable chance he should manage to get elected.

Then there’s the Connecticut Republican statewide underticket: lieutenant governor, attorney general, secretary of the state, state comptroller, and state treasurer. Truth be told, nobody gives a damn about the constitutional offices but the candidates, the Democrats running for those jobs are all incumbents, and nobody knows or cares who the Republican wannabes are.

As for underticket state representatives and senators, we shouldn’t be at all surprised to see even some traditionally safe Republican seats fall to Democrats. Because not only are the Republican incumbents and wannabes as lackluster and unimpressive as Ryan Fazio, they all lack the principle, scrotal content, resolve, and self-respect to even repudiate Donald Trump, let alone trash him as he deserves.

And Connecticut’s five Republican congressional guaranteed losers aren’t even worth thinking about. Because, of course, they too lack the principle, scrotal content, resolve, and self-respect to even repudiate Donald Trump, let alone trash him as he deserves. And at least one, Chris Shea, deserving and destined to lose to Jahana Hayes in the Fifth, has proudly affiliated himself with Trump—who, however, hasn’t endorsed him or any other Connecticut congressional candidate . . .