Remember the Epstein!
20 April—There’s a big celebration in the White House’s West Wing Cabinet Room today that the press is barred from—all the press, even the Trump ass-lickers. In fact, no one outside of Donald Trump’s inner circle of unquestionably loyal, trustworthy, corrupt, tight-lipped sycophants is allowed to attend the celebration or even know the details, although a select few menacingly militant MAGA morons and other criminals have in fact been invited.
The top-level secrecy is thought necessary for obvious public relations reasons as well as political expediency because Trump is throwing a 137th birthday bash for his idol and exemplar Adolf Hitler, who was born on this day in 1889 in Braunau am Inn, Austria-Hungary, which is plain old Austria today.
Although the White House hasn’t said and won’t say as much, while Hitler clearly can’t attend what’s essentially a celebration of his life and legacy, he has nevertheless been in the White House in spirit—and lots more—ever since Donald Trump moved in. Some would say Hitler has left his mark, but he had better taste than Trump.
The off-the-record (to say the least) Hitlers Geburtstagsfeier im Weißen Haus (Hitler birthday bash in the White House) has been organized by Trump’s Wilhelm Keitel, neo-Nazi warlord Pete Hegseth, with the enthusiastic encouragement and assistance—and some say impatient prodding—of Trump’s Joseph Goebbels, Jewish Nazi White House pain-in-the-ass Stephen Miller.
Trump’s Heinrich Himmler, Hindu Nazi FBI director Kash Patel, had been expected to be master of ceremonies and roast-master at today’s White House Hitler birthday bash, but the latest (as yet unconfirmed) reports are that he won’t be able to make it. It’s not clear whether he’s recovering from another hangover, out looking for a defamation-chasing shyster, or just missing in action—as he has a habit of being.
As things stand now, then, Trump’s Leni Riefenstahl, Karoline Leavitt, will be holding the podium for the event. It’s a pity that even Trump’s most trusted flunkies will be patted down for recording devices lest they produce compromising footage of the big bash.
Remember the Epstein!